I have never owned a pair of truly pretty shoes. All of my shoe purchases are generally based on whether the shoe works with my various orthotics or if I’m going for a dressier shoe (because I have yet to find a pretty shoe that works with even the least invasive orthotic) will they stay on my feet. This has left me with runners for day to day and casual (almost exclusively black) Mary Janes for when I need to dress up.
Shoes are the stereotypical feminine obsession. Chickflicks are full of characters who either have copious amounts of shoes or are lusting after a particular pair of inaccessibly expensive pumps in the store window. Brands like Jimmy Choo, Chanel, Miu Miu and Gucci are commonly mentioned with reverence. While these fictitious portrayals often exaggerate reality, there is a very real social expectation that women will wear pretty shoes.
It is not at all uncommon to see women wearing heels or ballet flats for everyday activities. These shoes are either notoriously uncomfortable (heels) or provide little support for the foot (flats). Stylish shoes are not only meant to be worn to special events or occasions but are often expected in day to day life. Some employers expect their female employees to wear heels. Though there is push back against those expectations.
Shoes are a fashion statement and it is very common to see women going their entire day wearing ballet flats or heeled boots.
I can’t wear either.
Day to day I am either using either my AFO
Or if I don’t know how many stairs I will encounter a pair of shoes that can accommodate my custom orthotic that compensates for the difference in my leg lengths
I had to get D width shoes to accommodate my AFO despite my B width feet and the fact that I only use an AFO on my feft foot. When I am just using an orthotic lift, I can get shoes of the appropriate width but my left foot is significantly smaller than my right so no matter how I shoe shop I always have one foot that is swimming in to much space (I can’t afford t buy two pairs of shoes to accommodate the difference). With runners, it is generally possible to tighten the shoe sufficiently to make a single pair work.
When it comes to formal or just more dressy events I have to forgo orthotics for the duration if I don’t want to have clunky runners paired with my nice dress. I am ok with this as these events are not frequent. One day or a few hours without orthotics every month or so is manageable–I rebelled when my job at a department store required black dress shoes and wore black runners instead–but finding dress shoes that fit is its own kind of hell.
I can’t wear heels (I would end up breaking an ankle) and flats just fall off my smaller foot. So I have been stuck with Mary Janes (flat shoes with an ankle strap). Even then I run the risk of rubbing the ankle of my smaller foot raw if the strap isn’t snug enough. Add to that the fact that my smaller foot has for the last few years been swelling in hot weather and dressy shoes are just a recipe for pain and discomfort.
So when my sister asked me to be a bridesmaid at her wedding this summer, my main wardrobe concern was the shoes. Luckily she left the choice up to the individual rather than restricting style or colour which would have made shopping a nightmare. It’s hard enough finding serviceable shoes as it is without adding restrictions. Although being unemployed I was dependent on my mother to purchase the shoes for me (she is a notorious bargain hunter).
Ever since I discovered the online marketplace Etsy, I have been obsessed, though generally from afar. I was particularly interested in the shoe makers who offered custom fit shoes. They have always been well out of my price range but I coveted them.
For the auspicious occasion of her daughter’s wedding and my role as bridesmaid, my mother (with much trepidation) agreed to buy me a pair. I selected a cute pair of oxfords. They are dressy enough for the occasion and cover enough of my foot so that the leather won’t dig in if my foot starts to swell at my sister’s outdoor wedding.
I sent them my foot measurements and e-mailed them scans of my feet so that they could tailor the shoes to my individual feet.
Just over a month later after a minor postal hiccup (the delivery person tried to deliver the shoes to a house across the street), they arrived and they are amazing.
For the first time in my 28 years, I have a pair of shoes that fit me perfectly (you can’t see the size difference in the photos. They are also the prettiest shoes I have ever owned.
I can’t fully explain how good it feels to finally have a pair of pretty shoes that match my personal style, rather than a pair that fits poorly and only barely qualifies as a dress shoe.
These will be my go to shoes for formal events, job interviews or whenever runners just won’t do until they fall apart (which I imagine won’t be for a while because they are really well made) or the shoe industry clues in that disabled people want pretty shoes too and that maybe, they should start catering to our needs instead of making us constantly make do with what little is available to us.